Thursday, November 24, 2011

Watch Out

“So wait, you’re my friend’s husband’s mistress? Or just my friend’s mistress? This is so complicated! Do you have some kind of powerpoint thingy on your iPhone where can just cook up an easy to view chart of all the hook ups going on in our circle of friendsAUUAHHAGHHAGGAGGGAGGHHHHHHHHHHHH”

“Morguk got wasted and rolled his razor scooter again. God dammit, now we have to schlep all the way over the Euphrates to get parts for that damn thing. Again. Grounding doesn’t work. Taking away internet privileges doesn’t work. Should we send him to boarding school? Would that make us bad parentsAUUAHHAGHAGAHAGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

“Oh word? A whole turkey? NICE. That actually looks pretty grubbin’, lady. Just wait ‘til you see what we have to bring to the potluck. Oh you just wait! Its a little maize salad with peppers, carrots and those little twirly pasta thingers you get at the salad bar sometimes. Its gonna blow your mind! Anyway, thanks for putting on this party. Its really cool! I think we’re gonna get along jut fine! We’re totally cool with letting you settle on some of our land and take part in our disease-free and war-free lifestyle. I really have a good feeling aboutthisAUUAUUAHAGAGGAGGGAGGHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

“Where the fuck did this Christmas tree ornament come from? I haven’t recognized the holiday since I was a wee child. Wait, who’s reflection is that? Is that Father Christmas come to pay me a visitAAUAUAUUAGAHAGAGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

“YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN…. aw fuck it. This is boring now. This priest isn’t phased by my rambunctious vocabulary, not even close. Maybe I should change gears and try having a peaceful dialogue with him in hopes to foster a move towards common groundAAUUAUHAGAHAGAHAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

“Far away across the field, tolling on the iron bell, calls the faithful to their knees, to hear the softly spoken AAUAUAUAUAUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

Tumblr's got a hold of this now.  Some of these are a hoot.

But wait. There's more!

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